The Many Jobs of Jacob Williams

My writing of my new screenplay "Jobs" has fallen off as of late. Why? Well, if you read the mission statement of this blog you'll understand that I am a lazy writer and so that is explanation enough. Along with being lazy, I'm also busy with other stuff that clouds my brain and keeps me from what I love to do best and that is, of course, writing.

Audrey is currently using lists as a way of getting ideas out of her head. She is learning that valuable lesson from her Master's program and there is truth in the statement that if one person in a relationship is doing something than the other is basically doing it as well. Needless to say, I've been learning a lot about writing and how to best get ideas out and onto the paper. So with that being said, I am going to draft a list of all of the jobs I've ever worked. This will hopefully reignite "Jobs" and help push the material out in a constructive way.

1. Village Pantry, Hot Foods Clerk - My first job. The Village Pantry is an Indiana only Seven Eleven gas station/convenience store. This particular VP was walking distance away from my house and therefore made a great place for my first venture into employment. Eager to show my quality, I came to work my first day in a dress shirt and tie and... the other employees laughed at me. They said they had a green vest for me and that ties weren't necessary for the work I was doing. I quickly took off the tie and got my hands dirty. My first task was to put a chemical cleanser in the men's urinal... and I didn't. I went to the bathroom, saw the clean urinal, and thought, "why would they need me to clean it?" So I didn't. My less than heroic work ethic kept me there only a couple of months as my best friend's mom had a better job offering. Coincidentally, that urinal I opted not to cleanse looks disgusting nowadays and I wonder if my laziness cursed it from the very beginning.

2. CVS, CSR - I didn't last long here. It was on the rough side of town and I'm a wimp. I tended the register, developed instant photos, and tried my best to keep the riff raff from stealing candy. 

3. Hollywood Video, CSR - This was "the job" for several years. Four years, in fact. I love movies and they loved me right back. They loved me so much they let me check them out to people, put them back on shelves, and eventually even manage and teach others to do those two tasks. Hollywood and I had a love/hate relationship. I met many friends there, got many friends jobs there, and most importantly got to know one very special brunette while working there. Yes Audrey and I met through a co-worker and started our dating life, because of Hollywood Video. Now The Wood is no more. Two years ago it was torn down due to the fact that people don't rent movies from video stores anymore, they either do digital download or rent from Netflix. In place of my longest running job is a KFC. Wonder why I've never gone in the restaurant...

4. American Electric Power, Field Technician - For three months after graduating college, I replaced old electric meters with new digital ones. There were many adventures doing this job. One time I passed out from working too hard, another time a dog on a chain tried to bite my head off, and another time I pulled off an old, faulty meter that showered hot sparks on my shirt causing some burning. I was kinda lost during this time. Auds was in Romania doing a 4 month missions trip and I was losing my noodle. I don't do well with separation it seems. As soon as I could, I left electric meters alone and went on to other things.

5. Kerasotes Theatre, Cashier - During my Field Technician days, I moonlit at the local movie theatre. I unsuccessfully tried to recapture my Hollywood Days and only lasted a month or so. 

6. LS Ayres, Cashier - Holiday help. I quit this job by leaving a "resignation letter" (See: Post-It Note) on the HR ladies desk half way through a particularly rough Saturday shift. I basically ran out of the store. They called me the next day and left a message on my phone saying "Hi, Jake we got your note... can you come back to work anyway?" I did not oblige them.

7. Name withheld for legal reasons, Print Coordinator - Ever worked a job that felt like any day you would show up in the morning and the business would be completely gone? Like the cubicles, paintings, phone, etc. would be ripped out and all that would be left would be a For Lease sign? This place was like that. First off, they had three businesses in one... most likely for legal reasons. They were one of those terrible companies that made money AND filled landfills at the same time. They brokered mass mailers for car dealerships. You know those stupid cardboard sheets you get the mail with a car key on it that if you take in to the local car lot you could win a freebie?  I was a Print Coordinator who made sure those stupid cardboard sheets got printed in a timely manner. This place was weird. Just ask my sister in law Dana who worked there with me until she couldn't take it anymore. These were the same people who fired me the day after I got back from my honeymoon. You can probably understand my residual anger at them.

8. Someplace in Indy, Door to Door Salesman - A wild, one day journey riding around with a pathological liar who was most likely stopping at random houses selling/scoring drugs. He had trunk full of Domino's Pizza coupons and I was being groomed to walk around and sell them. It sounded too good to be true. This was what I had been looking for. A frightening job that would certainly hurt my feet and leave me depressed every night. Sadly, they didn't have a health insurance plan so I didn't go back.

9. Someplace in Muncie, Insurance - Lasted just 2 hours and left after the hiring manager finished his pitch. Made quick like to the car and got the heck out of there.

10. My High School, Substitute Teacher - I did this for a few years and had a decent time. Everyone treated me great, but the work was inconsistent and so I never really got to heavily into it. Good times though.

11. Tru-Green, Lawn Care Technician- Three days of hard work. These guys really know how to hustle. The guy I trained under was one of the hardest workers I've ever met. Unfortunately, they wanted to pay me for 8 hours of work a day, but I would be working 11 hours a day. That and the fact that I'm a wimp didn't add up. On the third day, I went in and turned in my tan shirt, thanked the boss for his time, and went about looking for something that wouldn't drive me bonkers.

12. Local Electrician Company, Electrician's assistant - Never work for your landlord. They know how much you make. They know how much you owe them. It's bad all around. I didn't mind the work, though it was hard. It purged some of the wimp out of my system. In the end, working for the landlord was too tough and so I bailed.

13. EB Games, Asst. Manager - I was back on top. Bottom rung of middle management. I counted down cash drawers, sold video games, told others what to do. It was awesome... or the most stressful time ever. Rough patch, lots of hard nights. Felt miles away from my dreams. Actually, on one of those hard nights Auds was waiting for me to finish up the closing paper work while watching The Princess Bridge on the store's TV, usually reserved for promotional videos. William Goldman came on the screen talking about the screenplay process and writing and she turned to me said, "Will you go get your Master's already?" Two weeks later I was out of a job, but on my way toward what I really wanted to do.

14. J-Ideas, Graduate Assistant - One of the best jobs I ever had. J-Ideas was a First Amendment Institute at Ball State. Working for a group devoted to preserving our freedoms was super liberating. I felt like I was doing something important. I helped with the website, edited a bit of video, and really found my stride. J-Ideas is gone now, but I'll never forget the couple of months I fought the good fight.

15. Telecommunications Department, Graduate Assistant - For two years, I taught video production and screenwriting courses while in pursuit of my Master's Degree. This was a tough, but valuable time. It showed me that I didn't want to teach for a living, but that teaching does force you to learn twice. Tons of personal development happened during this time. 

16. Freelance, Videographer/Editor - After graduation I freelanced for a Pet TV show in Indy as well as a Visitor's Channel. Good professional development, skill building, social networking. Good pay when you can find the work.

17. World Media Group, Quality Control Engineer / DVD Authoring Engineer - My current job. The DVD Authoring work is growing steadily which is awesome. I even worked for the boss as a video editor making commercials for a live Bollywood show. Though the job has it's difficult moments, this is the most consistent professional work I've had in years... plus they have a health insurance plan.