No, not exactly...but this is how I wish it would start.
INT. HAMLISCH ESTATE - NIGHT
A night vision view of a storm outside the window of a dust covered room. A PONY TAILED MAN in his late thirties carries an electronic device that looks like a cordless razor covered in blinking Christmas lights. He turns to the camera.
PONY TAIL
According to my PKE meter, the influx of paranormal
residue appears to be coming from this room.
Pony Tail looks at his device. His eyes go wide.
PONY TAIL
This is amazing stuff. I haven't heard of readings this
high since the Viggo the Carpathian Incident in 1989.
I've got to tell Timothy.
Pony Tail takes a walkie talkie off of his belt and holds it up to his mouth.
PONY TAIL
Tim, you've got to get down here. Incredible stuff, Tim.
Tim. Over.
Tim doesn't respond.
PONY TAIL
Tim, where are you?
Tim? Tim?
Pony Tail looks at the camera man.
PONY TAIL
He always answers.
A LOUD GROAN can be heard from the room above them.
PONY TAIL
(SHOUTING)
Tim!
VOICE (O.S.)
(MUFFLED)
Help!
Pony Tail looks again at the camera man.
PONY TAIL
Dear god!
He runs out of the room. The cameraman follows him up the stairs. Pony Tail stumbles in the middle of the staircase.
PONY TAIL
We're coming, Tim!
Pony Tail frantically bounds up the rest of the stairs. He runs down the hallway to the room the sound is coming from. Pony Tail stops outside of the room. He holds up his PKE Meter to the cameraman. Every light on the device is glowing. Pony Tail's eyes are wider than ever.
PONY TAIL
Let's do this.
Pony Tail kicks open the door and rushes in. He stops dead in his tracks.
PONY TAIL
Oh my god.
The cameraman gets around Pony Tail and instantly stops on TIM, a bald man in his thirties laying on the ground. He is covered in goop. It appears he has pissed himself.
PONY TAIL
Tim, what happened?
Tim is catatonic. He is shaking and mumbling.
PONY TAIL
What's that smell, Tim?
Did you... did you mess yourself?
Tim does not respond. He only struggles to point to a closed door on the other side of the room.
PONY TAIL
Is there something in there?
Tim slowly nods. Pony Tail turns to the camera. He wipes sweat off of his forehead.
PONY TAIL
Finally... proof of the paranormal, this is gonna get
so many freakin' hits on our YouTube.
Pony Tail creeps toward the closed door.
PONY TAIL
Make sure you get this Mort.
The cameraman moves to get a better position to show Pony Tail open the door. Pony Tail reaches the door and looks at the cameraman one last time.
PONY TAIL
Eat your heart out, Ghost Adventures.
Pony Tail grabs the knob and flings the door open. He closes his eyes briefly. There is nothing there. Pony Tail leans his head into the closet.
PONY TAIL
What? Tim, there's nothing in here but old Twinkie boxes.
Pony Tail turns back to Tim.
PONY TAIL
This a joke?
Pony Tail turns back to the closet and is...
SLIMED by SLIMER. The green ball of ectoplasm blasts from the closet, hits Pony Tail in the chest, and knocks him to the ground. Pony Tail screams as Slimer smothers him. The cameraman backs up to get a better view of the sliming.
Suddenly a WHISTLE from the hallway outside the room stops Slimer.
In the door way stands, RAY STANTZ, with a cigarette hanging from his lips. Though older and heavier, Ray still wears his proton pack and holds his Neutrona Wand with the same confidence as before, maybe even more.
RAY
Come on, let's go. Don't make me light this up.
Slimer drools, causing tons of ectoplasm to fall onto Pony Tail.
RAY
Get in the trap and we'll just leave these three
poor, though misguided, fellas alone. Make it easy.
Ray drops the trap on the ground and kicks it over toward Slimer. Slimer lowers his head and begins to move toward the trap.
RAY
That's it. Good boy. You know the drill...
Slimer stops and slowly spins around with that same old hot-dog eating grin.
RAY
Don't do it. Don't do it.
Slimer smiles wide and flies at the cameraman. The cameraman falls backwards, we see only the ceiling. Ray's head appears in view.
RAY
Stay off of my turf and quit trying to steal
my customers.
HARD CUT TO:
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
2/23/11
12/31/10
The Hero's Path
The light cycle felt good under this weight. He never thought he'd care for the fast paced action of the Arena, but after your first victory you couldn't help yourself. After all he was a User and everyone in the stands loved him. They loved his blue lined suit. They loved the way he isolated opponents, turned their momentum against them, and kept winning the matches. They loved that he was different. They loved that he had the power to save them...
With all of the Tron: Legacy soundtrack listening I've been doing over the past few weeks I felt like a short blog might be a good idea. I'm saying now that the music from this movie will outlast the movie itself. The music is breathtaking. It feels like it could've been made in the 1980s and that is exactly how it should sound. The usage of the original Tron theme is pitch perfect as well. Anytime the listener needs to feel a connection to the original material Daft Punk drops a few bars of the old stuff. It's very smart for this music to stay close to home while also going for it's own unique sound.
With all of the Tron: Legacy soundtrack listening I've been doing over the past few weeks I felt like a short blog might be a good idea. I'm saying now that the music from this movie will outlast the movie itself. The music is breathtaking. It feels like it could've been made in the 1980s and that is exactly how it should sound. The usage of the original Tron theme is pitch perfect as well. Anytime the listener needs to feel a connection to the original material Daft Punk drops a few bars of the old stuff. It's very smart for this music to stay close to home while also going for it's own unique sound.
12/18/10
George Lucas is the Real Scrooge

I don't care that it happened out of canon. I don't even really care that it happened...
11/3/10
Long Sunset
This is a very short chapter from my long running Western "The Thousand Devils". I've been working on this/not working on this for closing in on 10 years. Earlier this year I completed the first draft in the screenplay that most likely doesn't make much sense. That's what happens over 10 years, you develop as a writer and the words you put down at the beginning of a span that long don't mesh at all with the words you are putting down now. I'm no longer a late teenager full of angst... I'm now a late twenty-something full of angst. Not really, but you get the idea.
So with all of that being said, I'm different now than I was then, meaning I have a different perspective from which I write. An epic in which a guy must hunt down and kill a bunch of demons now no longer gets me excited as a writer. I have to find a way to explore the characters. For the longest of times I was going to make Michael (the hunter character) my primary antagonist all the while keeping Wyman Rustwine, the retired Confederate soldier with a grudge against anyone who considers themselves a Yankee, the sidekick, stock character. But recently, I've been playing with the idea of making the narrator Rustwine and having him be "our eyes" through the story. So the following super short story is my way of working with that approach. Enjoy it . Hate it. Disregard it. Who cares... after this much time "The Thousand Devils" is a story I will either tell in due time or one that I will not. Hopefully I will finish the story someday... but I'm cool either way.
So with all of that being said, I'm different now than I was then, meaning I have a different perspective from which I write. An epic in which a guy must hunt down and kill a bunch of demons now no longer gets me excited as a writer. I have to find a way to explore the characters. For the longest of times I was going to make Michael (the hunter character) my primary antagonist all the while keeping Wyman Rustwine, the retired Confederate soldier with a grudge against anyone who considers themselves a Yankee, the sidekick, stock character. But recently, I've been playing with the idea of making the narrator Rustwine and having him be "our eyes" through the story. So the following super short story is my way of working with that approach. Enjoy it . Hate it. Disregard it. Who cares... after this much time "The Thousand Devils" is a story I will either tell in due time or one that I will not. Hopefully I will finish the story someday... but I'm cool either way.
10/17/10
The Death of Clark Kent
The sun beat down and for the first time, Clark Kent despised it. He had wandered the Earth for two lifetimes not changing at all. He'd seen Lois and their son and daughter all pass. Bruce and Diana too, though she'd outlasted the rest, had succumbed to their mortal fates. Only Clark remained.
Metropolis, his beloved city, lay in ruins as well, because they'd come. Zod's Army, other exiles from the Phantom Zone, broke out of their prison, found Earth, found Kal-El, and almost killed him. Clark's only ally, the bright yellow sun he'd lived under for so long, made him stronger than the entire army put together. He'd beaten them, just like the countless other foes over the centuries and he was tired.
He'd tried to turn to writing as Clark Kent III, but he world moved past newspapers and real journalism. They didn't care about facts, only what was directly relevant to their daily lives. He'd given up on that too. No more Truth, Justice, and the American Way... just him wandering the Mojave Desert, trapped by his need for sunlight and his everlasting life.
Many miles away the mighty Metropolis was no more. Following Zod's Army, the remaining citizens struggled to resume life. It was difficult, because they had no leader. No one to Trust. There was only Luthor. Not Lex, but his great grandson Vincent. A man born with synthetic Kryptonite in his skin. A man invincible to Kal-El. The ultimate version of his great grandfather's madness.
9/21/10
"There can never be too much chivalry."
Lately I've been feeling this need for knighthood in our culture. Knights were real men. They fought for what they believed in, treated others with respect, and above all else had ideals that defined them. Coincidentally, I feel like knights are all around me.
-I have the Rebel Alliance tattoo on my arm. While it is not specifically a Jedi tattoo, it does represent a lot of things to me including my love for the Jedi Knights and what they stood for in defending the Star Wars galaxy.
9/15/10
Time
I don't know what it is about this song, but I'm absolutely obsessed. It constantly makes me want to think, want to tear up, want to kiss my wife, want to slay a dragon, want to fight against all odds, want to strive to be a better man, want to relax, want to be strong, want to live.
The song "Time" from the Inception Score by Hans Zimmer has got me tied up in it's bar graph. It has quickly become the most listened to songs on my iTunes. It is epic and small, familiar and unique, classic Zimmer and new Zimmer.
There are times when I forget how inspiring film score has been. From an early age, I just really liked movie music. John Williams started it all. Then Alan Silvestri kept it going. A little Danny Elfman during the wild days. A dozen others thrown in for good measure Ennio Morricone, Nino Rota, Thomas Newman. And then there's Zimmer.
Hans has done something unique in forming his company Remote Control Productions. It is a posse of film composers all developing music for motion pictures. It is really outstanding. Like a meeting of the minds.
I'm inspired by this concept. Who knows maybe someday I will have a similar company, but for creative types.
Until then, listen to Time and see what it makes you think. Comments welcome.
The song "Time" from the Inception Score by Hans Zimmer has got me tied up in it's bar graph. It has quickly become the most listened to songs on my iTunes. It is epic and small, familiar and unique, classic Zimmer and new Zimmer.
There are times when I forget how inspiring film score has been. From an early age, I just really liked movie music. John Williams started it all. Then Alan Silvestri kept it going. A little Danny Elfman during the wild days. A dozen others thrown in for good measure Ennio Morricone, Nino Rota, Thomas Newman. And then there's Zimmer.
Hans has done something unique in forming his company Remote Control Productions. It is a posse of film composers all developing music for motion pictures. It is really outstanding. Like a meeting of the minds.
I'm inspired by this concept. Who knows maybe someday I will have a similar company, but for creative types.
Until then, listen to Time and see what it makes you think. Comments welcome.
9/8/10
Never Give Up, Terry Gilliam
Last night Audrey was writing up a script report for fivespockets.com. It appears that once again Terry Gilliam's long in development The Man who Killed Don Quixote has once again run out of financing and has halted production. While reading her report over her shoulder, I scoffed at Gilliam's pursuits.
"He's never going to get that off the ground," I said.
"Why do you say that," she asked, continuing to write.
"Because he has a stupid story nobody wants to spend money on," I said. "He doesn't need to have the main character go back in time and meet Don Quixote. He should just make the book into a movie."
Audrey glanced at me with a wrinkled brow.
"Why?"
I had no rebuttal. She had a point. One word from my wife's lips had me stumped.
Why couldn't he do whatever he wanted? And better yet, why had I copped such an attitude toward one of my childhood heroes? Why had I scoffed at the first director who made me really think about how weird this world is? Why had I become a cynical jerk?
9/5/10
Going the Distance (His Review) A Couple Spoilers
Audrey and I got the special chance of seeing a movie together on a Sunday night. This is a rare treat, because I work on Monday mornings and that limits our time on the last night of the weekend. Thanks to Labor Day we ventured out to see Going the Distance, the new Drew Barrymore/ Justin Long rom com. After the movie, we didn't talk about it, saving our opinions for our first He said/She said reviews. Audrey's review Going the Distance (Her Review) is here.
Going the Distance is the next film in a long line of films that could've been great, but wasn't due to the incessant need to be filthy. I'm not sure why we need all of the endless conversations in movies that revolve around oral sex, male genitalia, female genitalia, performing oral sex on yourself, performing oral sex on your spouse, women talking about oral sex, poop, oral sex. Believe it or not, I'm not a prude, but if I had to hear Jason Sudeikis say "Dick" one more time I think I would've walked out, gone home, and watched The Sound of Music.
Going the Distance is the next film in a long line of films that could've been great, but wasn't due to the incessant need to be filthy. I'm not sure why we need all of the endless conversations in movies that revolve around oral sex, male genitalia, female genitalia, performing oral sex on yourself, performing oral sex on your spouse, women talking about oral sex, poop, oral sex. Believe it or not, I'm not a prude, but if I had to hear Jason Sudeikis say "Dick" one more time I think I would've walked out, gone home, and watched The Sound of Music.
8/28/10
52 Week Shootout
Last night my wife and I are on our nightly walk through neighborhoods with houses we could never afford. They are the mansions where we would throw fancy pants Christmas parties with family who, like us, know nothing about fancy pants. All of us in bad sweaters drinking boxed wine amid crepe paper decorations, listening to Leon Redbone. It is a fantasy walk we take. A walk of future plans, intentions, and goals. It is our dream stroll through possibilities.
"I would love to read more of your writing," she says as we pass the Haunted Mansion.
"I'm writing," I defend. "I've got 30 pages down on Jobs."
Jobs is the not so super secret screenplay I broke ground on earlier this summer. It is a highly referential, semi autobiographical journey through our occupational struggles since getting married. CLARK, a painter in his mid 20s who loses his job the day after he gets back from his honeymoon with his writer wife, MARIE, must go on a journey through many jobs until finding... Needless to say, I am excited about the new script...
"I would love to read more of your writing," she says as we pass the Haunted Mansion.
"I'm writing," I defend. "I've got 30 pages down on Jobs."
Jobs is the not so super secret screenplay I broke ground on earlier this summer. It is a highly referential, semi autobiographical journey through our occupational struggles since getting married. CLARK, a painter in his mid 20s who loses his job the day after he gets back from his honeymoon with his writer wife, MARIE, must go on a journey through many jobs until finding... Needless to say, I am excited about the new script...
8/22/10
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World vs. The Switch


I don't know why I keep doing it. I will see a movie I like and then go to Aintitcool.com to see what those critics thought. And then I am surprised when they don't see it my way. When they use extremely crass and vulgar language to describe their distaste in the film. When they would rather not explain their view from an educated standpoint, but rather use the barrage of four letter words to express their opinion. Their reviews read as if the movie punched them in the face, took their wallet, and insulted their mother before the end credits rolled. More than anything I guess I've officially grown up and away from aintitcool and now need a new film review site to peruse, because I am tired of reading reviews from critics who loved "Scott Pilgrim vs. the World" and hated "The Switch"...
4/17/10
Shivering Timbers: The Treatment for Pirates of the Caribbean 4
Recently we purchased "Pirates of the Caribbean: The Legend of Jack Sparrow", a mediocre, old PS2 game. While the game wasn't very good, it did get Audrey and I talking about the film franchise and how badly the series ended. Specifically what happened to Keira Knightley's character Elizabeth Swann, who if you made it though the disastrous last chapter "At World's End" is forced to live alone on an island and wait for her love Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) to return for one day every ten years so they can... well, you know. As Audrey put it, "that is an anti-climatic, slightly sexist way to leave your female lead." Audrey also said (and I'll have to paraphrase) "she had these great adventures, became the Pirate King, all to end up as a single mother stranded on a deserted island."
To that I raised my coffee mug and said "Arrr, you know what they should do to fix both of those characters' crappy endings?"
To that I raised my coffee mug and said "Arrr, you know what they should do to fix both of those characters' crappy endings?"
3/21/10
Pick me out a Winner, Bobby

I don't want to end up like Roy Hobbs. You know Roy. The hero of the New York Knights, who for a season in his 40s shined on the baseball field like he did when he was young. A savior who with his bat, Wonder Boy, blew away fans and blew out light bulbs. Who made baseball something more than just a game. Who made every grown man cry, then rewind back to the beginning of the final scene to watch it twice, and then cry again.
Why wouldn't I want to be Roy Hobbs? Because I don't want to be in my 40s and meet my dreams. I want to be 28 and live out my dreams. I don't want to vanish during my formative years and succumb to lower expectations. I could blame that vanishing on my location. I live in the midwest, where it is common practice to push down dreams and go with the flow. To work jobs that are unfulfilling all the while saying "Everyone hates their jobs right?" To refuse our personal happiness and say it is noble to sacrifice. To be a martyr and say it is for the greater good. Let me blunt... this is crap.
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